Watch closely now…
I said I wanted to write a bit about using Leadership as a means of creating new behavior in someone else. Do I honestly believe that is possible? Well not really. Three teenagers and a husband, later I KNOW it’s not possible. The only one I have control over is me.
But I still had this idea floating around about “be the change I want someone to be”. If, in fact, it was possible to have that kind of an impact on someone in a relationship, was it not possible to create magic in other ways?
Magicians use more than one type of movement to distract it’s audience. Why not a Leader? If I told someone, let’s say in a coaching relationship, what I was trying to do, they would be a willing participant in our relationship. Isn’t that why they hired me? We could do it under a plastic see-through glass because the brain could be just as easily be swayed while everything is in plain sight or under a plastic see-through glass.
When I started to think how I coached people, when I realized that that is indeed what I do. I tell them I’m going to ask questions, a lot of questions. My intention is to make them think. I wanted them to think their way into a new neural map or in other words create a new behavior or habit. Asking them to think was the distraction. A different kind of distraction.
The last few days, I had, in fact, been doing that very thing with myself. I had been distracted by the buzz of questions from the intersection of two different events. The result was the actual magic: I started thinking creatively about a connection between two things. My brain was utterly distracted by ideas and I made some important connections I could use within my own business.
If I could do that with myself then most certainly that was what I was doing with my own clients. I ask them tons of questions that get them thinking about what they are doing, how they want to change, how important was it, how often did they think about it. I put them under the plastic glass and with my slight-of-hand: my questions, I was making a impact on them. I was creating an environment that allowed them to become enveloped by an inspiration. I was distracting them from the way it was and guiding them to see the magic of how they wanted it to be. Not only in a way they wanted it, but providing a guide map on how to make it happen and to make it stick.
In fact it as much easier than just being the change I wanted someone to be. They are asking me to help them. They pay me to be the Magician. They pay me to create the environment where the magic will happen. I tell them I will be asking questions to create the distraction. The distraction results in inspiration they achieve when they reflect on their responses. The inspiration is the magic. What a neat package this all makes and all because of a slight-of-hand trick.